It have been a long time i have not been blogging.... i am talking to myself anyway.

I kept thinking..

What should i do after i ord?

I wanted to study higher nitec not because i wanted to study.. But because i wanted to have a dragonboat team again..

If money is not a issue after i ord, i guess i will just go higher nitec and probably go work after that..

This few day i cant get to slp beacuse that i have been having a serious thought.. Being a student and row for dragonboat is what i really want and if i started

working after i ord, i am dam sure i wont have this kind of exp already... LIfe is only once, u do what u want and make it a amazing one in your own ways.

And higher nitec is stepping stone for me to poly, thats not the main purpose..

I can even imaging that i already ord and i have to finish study at simei ite then go back down to cck ite for dragonboat training and motivate those that i have to and build up a good team..

So i went to ask yan whether he want to study higher nitec, he say it is a waste of time and i find it too... And from there i am half hearted towards studying.

Just as i went to gym just now after work ( althought i am dam tired and feeling unwell beacuse of flu, but i still make the effort to train and spend time with them)..

From there, they start to talk about dragonboat and the different batches that we have been through and those junior that is currently now in ite serving ite west draonboat.

Now really makes me wanted to go study for 2 years in higher nitec and started my working life and maybe to marriage and if i am lucky enough to see my grandson and pass away peacefully to a place that where we should go after we die...

I am quite into building my body now. Something is motivating me, although i dunno what to do even when i get a nice body with nice muscle and ord if i start working i doubt i gonna maintain it.. But i just wanted to do all i can as i find it a waste of life if i am those lazy lazy type and dun bother to try it out..

LIfe is seriously dam short.. I am already 20 and i am afraid of people around me getting older and might be gone the following days. Be it friend or maybe someone i walk past and i see their face before and i know that they pass away?

Thats how i find life is..... We are brought to this world to suffer... probably its a test

for us to determine hell or heaven..

But anyway

I seriously dunno what to do next after i ord........................................................................

STUDY? for dragonboat and a life time exp..

Work?? to have the money and wait for monthly pay and let your life pass just like that.

Which one??

waste 2 years in ite just for the sake of new teammate/glory/better person.. or...

Work and die.

Fuck it man. i got no one to talk to.

at least i feel better after tpying it here and let myself see it..